I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
