Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
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Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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