One girl and one boy is just not enough.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
