Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
No subtext here. People are naked.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
