Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize