i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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