I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
