I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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