You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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