Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
