i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize