I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
lol hangovers are for mortals.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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