i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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