Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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