Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
