Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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