Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
