the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
