The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
