I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
