shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize
