Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I'm always down for nudity.
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