I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize