He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
