Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
