Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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