Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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