69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
