STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
only if we run a train.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.