She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
