Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
