I cockslap morals
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
