Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
