better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
