Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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