I wish I could punch you in the face.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
