What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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