Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Randomize
