how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize