If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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