did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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