Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
