The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
