if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
