walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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