i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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