I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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