Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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