Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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