Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
