sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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