If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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