I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
