yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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